The Making of a Servant of God

Tom Shrader draws from Paul's self-description in 1 Corinthians 15:8-10 and Isaiah's vision in Isaiah 6 to show that authentic service to God flows from a genuine encounter with His holiness. Just as Isaiah's cry of 'woe to me, for I am ruined' came from seeing God as He truly is, so every believer must come to a place of broken self-awareness before they are prepared to serve. The teaching calls Christians to dream boldly about being used by God, even if that means shepherding just one soul, because seeing God clearly transforms both self-understanding and purpose.

“By the grace of God, I am what I am — and His grace toward me did not prove vain, but I labored even more than all of them, yet not I, but the grace of God within me.”

— Tom Shrader

Series: 1 Corinthians

Recorded: 2002 at East Valley Bible Church

Duration: 38 min

Themes: humility, calling, service, brokenness, holiness, grace, self-awareness, purpose, feeling unworthy, new believer, struggling with pride, young adult, new to leadership, pastor, mentor, questioning your purpose

Scripture: 1 Corinthians 15:1-19, Isaiah 6:1-8, Acts 8:1, Acts 9:1-2, 2 Corinthians 11:28, John 12:41, Matthew 5:3

Theological Themes: sanctification, vocation, divine calling, atonement, resurrection, servant leadership, repentance, transforming grace

Full Transcript

Paul's Description of Himself

Open your Bibles to 1 Corinthians chapter 15. That is the resurrection chapter. Paul says in verse 12, if Christ is preached, then He has been raised from the dead — how do some among you think there is no resurrection of the dead? What was going on in this church was that they believed Christ had been raised from the dead, but they were confused about what happens to believers when they die. Paul is writing this chapter in his classic style to deal with that issue. The eleven verses before verse 12, and then all the way through the balance of the chapter down to verse 58, are focused on this issue.

Paul begins by building the case concretely that Christ indeed has been raised from the dead. Here is the gospel in a nutshell: Christ died for our sins. If you have been around church, you have heard that statement countless times. Here is what Paul does — this is huge. He takes Christ's death and links it to your sin. Somehow over the years you can miss that, even hearing that phrase all the time. Christ's death and your sin are linked together. Christ died for our sin, and then they buried Him, and then He was raised from the dead, and all of this was done according to the Scriptures.

God, before the foundations of the earth, had a plan, and that plan was to save His people from their sin. After Paul talks about the gospel in a nutshell, he says that not only did Jesus rise from the dead, there were people who saw Him. There in 1 Corinthians 15 he lists some of them. This is not a list of all the people who saw the risen Christ — we know there were Mary Magdalene and others — but here is what he lists: Peter, then the twelve, that is the apostles, and then more than five hundred.

Paul writes, "After this, He appeared to more than 500 brethren at one time, most of whom remain until today. Some have fallen asleep." Because he is writing about twenty-five years after the fact, he is saying: there were five hundred people who saw Christ at one time; some have since died, but many are still alive, and if you need an eyewitness, go and talk to them — investigate this. Then Christ appears to James — Jesus' half-brother, sharing the same mother Mary, with Joseph as his earthly father — and then He appears to Paul.

Not Fit to Be Called an Apostle

When Paul begins to talk about himself, he describes his role this way in verse 8: "And last of all, as it were to one untimely born, He appeared to me also. For I am the least of the apostles, and not fit to be called an apostle, because I persecuted the church of God. But by the grace of God I am what I am" — and you could stop right there and put your own name in, saying that by God's grace you are what you are — "and His grace toward me did not prove vain, but I labored even more than all of them, yet not I, but the grace of God within me."

Last week we spent time on Paul, and my intent was to start today at verse 11 and work through verse 19. Yesterday afternoon, in preparing for the six o'clock service, I decided I did not want to do that. I cannot get away from this description Paul gives of his life, his call, and himself, and I want to take it and apply it to our lives. I want to make certain that we see this clearly. I want to make certain you do not allow it to remain abstract and simply say, "Well, that is Paul, and good for Paul — Paul needed that, but I do not." This is really important.

So by way of reminder, here are some of the key phrases we extracted from these verses. Paul said "last of all," and what he meant was that the last appearance of the risen Christ was to him. Two things follow from that. First, the appearance to Paul is just as legitimate as the appearance to Peter, to the twelve, to James, or to any of the others. But second, it was last of all — that was the end of the sequence. The resurrected Christ in that form is not appearing again.

Here is why that matters. There are people today who wonder whether there are apostles for today. The answer is no. Scripture is very clear that an apostle had to have seen the risen Christ, and Paul says that sequence is now closed. "Last of all, one untimely born" — that phrase carries all sorts of implications in the language. One idea is someone whose timing was off, which is partly what it means here. The twelve walked with Jesus; Paul was not one of them. But it also carries the idea of someone who is hopeless for life without divine intervention — someone in whom God had to move.

I Persecuted the Church

As Paul describes himself he speaks of this appearance being last of all, the untimeliness of his spiritual birth, and then he says, "I am not fit to be called an apostle." This is not self-deprecation — Paul is not saying, "Shucks, I am nothing." He is saying he is genuinely not worthy of this. And then he tells us why: because he persecuted the church.

You do not need to turn there, but let me refresh your memory. In the book of Acts, Luke is writing about the early church. There is the stoning of Stephen, the first martyr. The men who were going to stone him took their cloaks off and laid them at the feet of Saul, and they stoned Stephen. Luke writes in Acts chapter 8, verse 1: "Saul was in hearty agreement with putting him to death. And on that day a great persecution arose against the church in Jerusalem, and they were all scattered throughout the regions of Judea and Samaria, except the apostles. And some devout men buried Stephen and made loud lamentation over him. But Saul began ravaging the church." That word translated "ravaging" appears in extrabiblical Greek literature. It is used to describe an animal that takes its prey —

The Haunting of Paul's Past

Paul ravages the church. He tells us he entered house after house, dragging off men and women, and he put them into prison. In chapter 9, Luke picks up the story: "Now Saul, still breathing threats of murder against the disciples of the Lord, went to the high priest and asked for letters from him to the synagogues at Damascus, so that if he found any belonging to the Way, both men and women, he might bring them bound to Jerusalem." In other words, Paul had unleashed this persecution on the church and was satisfied that it was strong enough and deep enough, and was beginning to take its toll. He said, "My job's done here. I'm going to Damascus now. I want a letter from the high priest so that when I get there, they'll give me the authority to take these men and women, bring them back to Jerusalem, and we'll do whatever we need to do with them."

It was on that Damascus road that he sees the Lord. Paul says he is not fit to be an apostle because he persecuted the church. As I read through the whole writing of the Apostle Paul, the theme I see consistently is his love for the church, his love for Christians — not just for people separately, but collectively. In 2 Corinthians chapter 11, when Paul outlines all of the beatings, the stoning, the shipwrecks — taking ten verses to do it — he says this in verse 28: "Apart from such external things, there was the daily pressure on me, the concern for all the churches." Paul loved the church.

On three different occasions in the book of Acts, he had an opportunity to share his testimony. All three times, he begins by talking about his persecuting of the church. This haunts Paul. He understands forgiveness. He understands that he will not be held accountable for that sin in the sense that it will be counted against him. He understands that forgiveness is his and heaven is his home — but he looks back and says, "Let me tell you what I did. I was a persecutor of the church."

By the Grace of God

Here is the key verse: 1 Corinthians 15:10 — "But by the grace of God, I am what I am." I want to come back to this point one more time, and then I promise I will not return to it again for a week or two. We do need to come back to this over and over again.

Here are a couple of sentences I wrote yesterday afternoon: If you haven't been converted like the Apostle Paul, then you haven't been converted at all. Obviously the circumstances are different, but the substance is the same. It is a sense of inadequacy resulting from seeing or understanding who God really is. Then, and only then, are you prepared to live a life of service for God — for God's glory.

I am acknowledging that circumstances will be different. I would guess that in this room right now there are about 713 of you, and of those, a portion are Christians. I am guessing that none of you were knocked to the ground on the way to Damascus in your desire to persecute the church. So when I say identical to Paul, I do not mean circumstance — I mean substance. There has to be a point in my life, whether I can pinpoint it or not.

Billy Graham pinpoints the date. Ruth Graham says, "I don't really know. I just am. I just know that this is where I am now." I am not concerned about whether you can give a time and a date. If you can, fine. If you cannot, that is fine too. What I am concerned about is whether you have had this radical experience.

What Conversion Looks Like

That experience is going to look different for different people. In my life, when I became a Christian, it was very evident to those around me that something had changed. At the same time, there was a guy I knew pretty well who became a Christian also. We used to meet periodically down at Chubb's — it was a great place to get a cheeseburger, though it is not there anymore. We met at Chubb's one day, about a year into our faith, and we were talking.

I said, "Tommy, my life has changed so radically. In years past there was this — how do you — there is no change." He said, "There is radical change in my life. I am doing the same things, but I am doing them now with a converted heart." That is exactly what I am getting at. It may or may not look different from the outside. If you are a good man or a good woman, it may not look that radically different on the outside — but on the inside, your whole world has become technicolor. All of a sudden the reds are sharper, the oranges are clear, the yellows pop out. Life is alive for you because your heart has been changed.

The Making of a Servant

In the Christian world, we talk about service — serving the Lord, ministry. The Greek word basically translates as servant, service. What I am saying is this: you are not fit for that service until your heart has been converted. That is what I want to spend our time on this morning, and what I have called this is "The Making of a Servant of God."

I think it is important for us to understand that being a servant of God ought to be our desire — a goal, a dream, a driving force. I am going to invite you to turn to the book of Isaiah, chapter 6, and we will spend the morning there. There ought to be in your heart, as a Christian, that driving desire.

Now, you could easily misunderstand what I am about to say, so bear with me all the way through this illustration. I watched yesterday a new infomercial for Richard Simmons. Richard Simmons fascinates me — I truly mean that. I am fascinated by this guy and by the following he has. It is easy to sit and throw darts at someone like Richard Simmons, but if you watch him and listen to him, the people he is talking to walk away saying, "Richard Simmons cares. He loves me." There was a woman on there who had weighed, I believe, 521 pounds and now weighs around 180, and they were interviewing her —

The Dream God Has for You

There has to be in your life a dream. If you don't have a dream, even the most cynical, nonchalant person in here has some dream. What I'm saying to you is your dream ought to be connected with your service to God. It's not a big enough dream to say you want to make quota, or get your handicap to two, or make the team. Those are fine — I don't want to take those away from you — but even those dreams have to be in the context of what God is going to do for you.

I'm convinced that most Christians miss it because they don't let themselves dream big enough about how God will use them. He may use you in such a big way that He may use you to save one soul. Can you imagine that dream? That blows past quota and golf handicaps and videos.

We used to do real estate deals, and there was never the pressure with a deal that we have here on a daily basis, because we are dealing now with souls. Can you imagine that the shepherds of this church might entrust you to shepherd a soul? Have you ever dreamed that big? I'm not talking about ministering to a hundred — I'm talking about ministering to one. Can you imagine that the Creator God of the universe would trust you with one soul? Will you dream that big with me?

Isaiah's Vision: The Context

How do you get to that point? Isaiah becomes a great model. Isaiah chapter 6, verse 1: "In the year of King Uzziah's death, I saw the Lord." We don't have to guess — this is 739 BC. Uzziah was a king of Israel and a pretty good king. One author writes this: of all the kings of Israel, none had done so much for the nation as King Uzziah, except David. Solomon's greatness was largely inherited — he certainly stands as a figure more splendid than Uzziah, but not as great in service.

Uzziah became king at age sixteen and reigned for fifty-two years. He was a pretty good king, but the book of Chronicles tells us that when he grew older, he grew stronger and became proud to his own destruction. He actually went into the altar and tried to usurp the role of priest. He was struck with leprosy, and the rest of his years were spent in isolation.

With Uzziah's demise, the nations were gathering around Israel, ready to pounce. That is the backdrop. Isaiah, in the midst of this, is probably going through what much of the nation is going through: What is going to happen without Uzziah? He might have lost his edge in his last few years, but at least they knew what to expect. You see that around you all the time — what will happen when so-and-so dies? What will happen to the business, to the government, to the team, to the family? Against this backdrop of a dead king, God gives Isaiah a vision.

What Isaiah Saw

Here it is: "I saw the Lord seated on a throne, lofty and exalted, with the train of His robe filling the temple." And Isaiah sees the Seraphim. They stood above Him, each having six wings — two to cover the face, two to cover the feet, and two for the purpose of flying.

Let's be very clear about the God Isaiah sees. He sees Jesus Christ. John chapter 12, verse 41 — Jesus quotes Isaiah, and John writes: "Isaiah said this because he saw Jesus' glory and spoke of Him." He sees the scene you will see in heaven. Christ is seated, lofty, exalted — a position of authority over all creation — and His train fills the temple.

I have been thinking a lot about trains lately, specifically bridal trains. Haley called a couple of weeks ago and asked if I could meet her Tuesday night at five. I said I had a meeting. She said she was getting fitted for her wedding dress and asked if I could be there. I said I would move the other thing around. So I was there — Susan was there, grandma and grandpa were there — and Haley came out from behind the curtain, and she was beautiful. She just looked so beautiful, so fragile, and it was a really stunning wedding dress. She came out, and there was this train, with Sarah lifting it, laying it down while they did the alterations.

On June 28th, supposed to be seven o'clock but probably closer to 7:10, the doors will open, she'll come down the aisle, and she will be magnificent. That dress is gorgeous — but it is not going to fill the worship center. That is the picture here. He is lofted, exalted, lifted up, and that train fills the temple. The picture is the omnipresence of God. That is as He really is.

The Holiness of God

These Seraphim are not mentioned anywhere else in Scripture. They are unique creatures — six-winged — and they cover their faces. In that image we see reverence, service, worship, praise, and activity all swirling around the throne. Here is what they are doing, verse 3: "And one called out to another and said, 'Holy, holy, holy is the Lord of hosts. The whole earth is filled with His glory.'" They are singing back and forth to one another.

Holy is a difficult word for us. We see it in Scripture — a holy handshake, a holy kiss, a holy book — and in our context those phrases simply mean something set apart. But when we apply the word holy to God, it is not that part of Him is set apart. It is simply what He is. It means otherness.

Seeing God as He Really Is

We are at the brink of beginning to see God and understand God for who He really is. This is that magnificent seeing. In the midst of this, verse 4, the foundations of the threshold begin to tremble with His voice, and the temple is filled with smoke. One author writes that the shaking and the smoke symbolize God's holiness — we see His holiness with the train, but now we see in the smoke and the shaking His holiness especially as it relates to His judgment and His wrath.

Here is Isaiah. Uzziah has died. Questions fill his mind. All of a sudden God gives him this vision, and he sees Christ enthroned, ruling, smoke, trembling — a picture of His judgment, His wrath, and His character.

Woe Is Me: The Shattering of Self-Sufficiency

Look at verse 5. The first word is absolutely a key word: "Then." In other words, as a response to what he saw, Isaiah said, "Woe to me, for I am ruined." That is the New American Standard. The King James says, "Woe to me, for I am undone." The picture is this: I thought I had it all together, but now, in contrast to the Holy God, I have nothing together.

There is a group of scholars who suggest Isaiah was already a prophet. There is another group who say no — this is what launches him as a prophet. But what everyone agrees upon is this: Isaiah was a good man. One author writes, "So far as we know, Isaiah was a young man of excellent character. No doubt he had the confidence and respect of all who knew him. The probabilities are that his life was above reproach." Here is this good man. Everybody is telling him he is a good man, that he will be a prophet someday if he is not already. And all of a sudden he sees God for who He really is, and he says, "Woe to me, for I am undone."

That, right there, is what happens to you at conversion. How are you going to get an accurate view of yourself? You will never get it by looking around. You can always find people worse than you, and the tendency is to come up alongside them because we like to be measured that way.

Haley had her first big test the other day. I said, "How did you do? What did you get?" She said, "I was two-tenths of a point from an A." I said, "Well, you got a B." She said, "I was two-tenths of a point from an A." I said, "But you got a B." Is that not how we look at ourselves? We are constantly giving ourselves the benefit of the doubt. We don't trust the government. We don't trust management. If we are in management, we don't trust labor. We don't trust anybody — we give nobody a break except ourselves. When I sin: "Hey, boys will be boys. That's just the way it is. I fly off the handle. I get mad once in a while. But even when I do, it's over quick." I explode and it's over quick, just like Hiroshima. It is over quick. Is that not how we work? Is that not how we think?

Knowing God Through His Word

What is going to move a sinner? What is going to move a sinner's heart? One thing and one thing only — and that is to see God as He really is. That is why we cling to this book. We study the Word of God so that we can know the God of the Word. The only way I am going to understand Him is to know this Word.

Looking around outside, I get a sense of Him. I see stars and moons. We now have the NASA channel on our cable, so I watch. I have a real interesting sequence there — I get the Catholic channel, the Mormon channel, and the NASA channel, so I just click through them all to see what is going on. I was watching NASA last night. They were getting ready to pick up the Hubble telescope — I believe they did it this morning around 3:13 Eastern Time. I cannot remember a verse, but I can remember that. That is sad. When they retrieve the Hubble telescope, they are going to replace the power system, and with a new power pack they will be able to look far out into the universe.

You know what they are going to discover? There is a God. But they are not going to really know Him until they get to this book. Out there I know that He is powerful and mighty, that He can create something from nothing. But this is where I know what He is really like. You live at a time where God is up for grabs. Some think He is dead. Some think He is all love. Some think He is all kindness. Some think He is all judgment. All of these are caricatures of God.

When somebody says to you, as you are sharing your faith, "My God would never send anybody to hell," notice what they did. They did not say the God of the Bible would never do that. They said "my God" — the one they made. God created man in His image, and we have been returning the favor ever since, shaping Him, cutting Him, molding Him to be exactly what we want Him to be.

Pride Shattered in the Presence of God

All of a sudden Isaiah sees Him, and he is ruined. Here is what shattered his pride. Ray Stedman — it did not get much better than old Ray. Ray writes this: "A marvelous lesson that runs through all of Scripture is that nothing hinders our being used by God more than our pride and our self-sufficiency. When Isaiah saw the majesty, the glory, the effectiveness of God, there came burning in his heart a desire to be used of God, to have a part in God's glorious work."

There is the dream. What is shattered here is Isaiah's pride. Our number one sin — your number one sin, my number one sin — is pride, self-sufficiency. When all of a sudden I see God for who He really is, I understand that He is opposed to the proud and gives grace to the humble, and my view changes entirely.

Before the worldview changes, my view of myself changes. I see Him as He really is, and the first thing it affects is my view of me. All of a sudden, rather than seeing all the weaknesses of the people around me, I see my own weaknesses and my own sin. And I see that my tendency is to focus on others rather than on myself.

Blessed Are the Poor in Spirit

Blessed are the poor in spirit, Jesus says at the beginning of the Sermon on the Mount. There are two ways to translate that word "poor." One describes somebody who has some resources but is short of what he needs. The other describes somebody who is totally destitute — someone who has to beg for their existence. That is the word He uses.

Like a physical beggar begs every day, a spiritual beggar begs every minute: God, I need your strength. I need your mercy. I need your grace. I need your wisdom. I need you. You are all I need. A little byproduct of this is that all of a sudden you quit complaining about your circumstances, because you realize that no matter how bad they are, you deserve worse — that even in your sickness, even in your need, in your lack, God gives you grace.

Have you seen God like this yet? Because if you haven't, I don't think you're converted. That is just my view and I cannot judge your heart, but that seems to be what Paul says.

From Persecution to Encounter

Consider the illustration in Acts 9. Paul thinks he is on a mission for God. He is going to wipe out this cult. And then he says, "Lord, who are you?" And the Lord answers, "It is me that you are persecuting." Do you see the connection we have with the Lord? When someone persecutes His people, he persecutes Him. That is how connected you are to Christ as His people.

Woe to Me — and the Coal from the Altar

Isaiah says, "Woe to me, for I am ruined." But God does not leave him there. Quickly God provides provision. "Then one of the seraphim flew to me with a burning coal in his hand, which was taken from the altar with tongs, and he touched my mouth and with it he said, 'Behold, this has touched your lips and your iniquity is taken away, your sins forgiven.'"

This is repentance in our context. All of a sudden I see God for who He really is. I see myself for who I really am. I say, woe to me — I am undone, I am hopeless, I am helpless, I have no chance. And He says, "That is right. Look to the cross." Jesus died for your sin. Believe He is who He said He was. Believe God raised Him from the dead, and you today will have eternal life.

Here I Am — Send Me

But there is one more component to this. Look at verse 8. Isaiah is speaking: "Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, 'Whom shall I send? Who will go for us?' And he said, 'Here I am. Send me.'"

A couple of years ago I was walking down the hall while the kids were in one of the small classes. It was time to pray, and the teacher said she was going to pray. One kid asked, "Can I pray?" And all of a sudden every kid in the room was saying, "Can I pray? I want to pray. I want to pray." I started laughing, because I have been in meetings with their parents when I say, "Let's pray," and nobody wants to pray. That is this scene. Here is God saying, "We have this work to do — who am I going to send?" And Isaiah is saying, "Here I am. Send me, because I am ready now, God."

If you get this backward, you are going to be worn out and frustrated. That is religion — trying to do the work without the foundation. Isaiah was not ready for the job until he saw God for who He was, saw himself for who he was, and accepted the repentance and forgiveness that God gave him. Now he says, "I am ready to go." Is that you?

The Ganges and the Kindergarten Classroom

I watched a documentary on the Ganges River. This man traces it from its source all the way until it empties into the sea. At one point he interviews someone who says, "This is the Holy River. When I touch the river, I am touching God." They have a festival with flowers sailing down the river, and the commentator calls it the most sacred, holy thing he has ever seen.

At that moment I thought of Dave Pritchard. Most of you do not even know him. Dave is a big guy who played right tackle for SC a couple of years ago and married Tom Angstead's daughter. I have no idea why he came to mind, other than that a Sunday or two before I had been walking by and saw Dave teaching kindergarten. He walks into the room and half the room is taken up just by him being in it. You know who responds when Dave walks in and sits down? The boys. He owns those boys. I saw this giant with these little kids, and I was struck by it.

In every one of those rooms we try to have men present. We were at another church not long ago and went down to look at the classrooms — every single one was staffed by women. Where are the men?

No One Has Any Life

Last night at the six o'clock service there was a lot going on. A week ago I was talking to a woman who thanked me for having that service, saying her whole family could now worship together on Saturday night. I said that was great. Then, thinking she might enjoy Sunday free, she told me, "Oh no, I have to come back Sunday morning and work in the nursery." I said that sounded hard. She said it was only for a year or so until the new buildings were built.

Talking with the staff the other day, I realized that no one on our staff has any life at all. We go around talking about what we are doing, and it is either family or church, ministry or shepherding. I told them we had better take a look at this — maybe we are out of balance, maybe something is wrong, maybe we need to go fishing or something. I knew then I was thinking in the flesh, because I would never normally think that way.

The Normal Christian Life

What do you do with your day off? I said, well, I relax a little bit, and then look forward to getting back to work. They said, that's the point.

See, that's what I want you to see. This is not a description of the prophet or the apostle. It is not a picture of a youth minister. That is supposed to be the normal Christian life.

Have you seen God through the Scripture? Here is how you know you have. When you have seen Him, you will say, "Woe to me, for I am undone." I am helpless and hopeless apart from Him. I have no chance.

With Him, you will dream so big that He may give you a soul to minister to or to shepherd. Remember the old Lay's potato chips? You can't eat just one. I am telling you, that is the way ministry is. The minute you see God use you to touch somebody's life, you are going to say, where is the next one?

Is this the way you think? That is how a converted person thinks, and that is how a maturing person thinks. Take advantage of all those opportunities around you.

Closing Prayer

Father, would You do this work in our lives — individually, corporately — and change us? God, let us be a church that sees You, and when we do, we are not filled with despair. We are broken over our sin, but we know where to turn for an answer, and we know where there is hope. There is hope in You and nowhere else.

God, we pray that You would make us servants — that we would serve one another, that we would serve faithfully, individually, but collectively as a body — and be a place that is known for the way we serve. God, that will happen only if You do a work in our lives. We beg You to do it. In Jesus' name, amen.