What are You Afraid Of?
Tom Shrader identifies fear as the greatest obstacle to living out God's purpose in our lives, examining common fears including death, economic insufficiency, rejection, loneliness, suffering, failure, and insignificance. Drawing from Philippians 3:12-14 and Jesus' frequent command to 'do not be afraid,' he demonstrates how Christ provides the antidote to each fear through His promises and presence.
“Every time you have an opportunity to fear, you have a corresponding opportunity to trust God.”
— Tom Shrader
Series: How to Turn the World Right-Side Up
Recorded: July 25, 1996
Duration: 42 min
Themes: fear, courage, purpose, victory, anxiety, trust, overcoming, faith, facing uncertainty, career transition, midlife crisis, feeling insignificant, struggling with anxiety, searching for meaning, new believer, seasoned christian
Scripture: Philippians 3:12-14, Luke 24:46, 1 Peter 5:6, Psalm 139, James 1:2-4
Theological Themes: providence, gods sovereignty, divine calling, spiritual warfare, sanctification, holy spirit, biblical promises, christology
Full Transcript
This is really what we talked about last week, at least in a certain sense. Last week we talked about how to turn your world right-side up. The premise is pretty important. The text is Philippians chapter 3, verses 12 through 14. What we're doing is looking at Paul's life and saying, how is it that Paul made this unbelievable impact? We understand that it was the Holy Spirit working in his life. But we also understand that the same Holy Spirit that worked in Paul's life works in your life. So you stand without excuse from that perspective.
The issue is, what happened in Paul's life? Certainly one of the key things, and it has to be broad in scope, is that Paul said, "I continue to press on toward the prize and the purpose for which Christ Jesus took hold of me." We can unpack that statement and pull out a whole bunch of things. Right out of the top, what we find is that God was the one that moved. God was the one that took control of Paul's life. God gave Paul a purpose. Here's probably the key thing: you have a purpose and a reason for being. Life is not random. Life is not accident. Life is not just something that came along. All of it has design, and all of it has purpose, and all of it has meaning.
The Shift from Stress to Meaning
I apologize if this part is repetitive. I've talked so much lately that I don't remember where I said what to who. But in this process of life, it's interesting. Five, six, seven years ago, every seminar, every book, every conference, every small group was on stress and burnout. It just seemed like every time you went somewhere, it was stress. If you went to an industrial builders conference, there was one on stress. You went to sales people, there's one on stress. Everybody had stress.
Unless the guy hasn't found a new gig and is still doing stress and burnout, most of those guys have moved beyond that. What we're looking at now, and it's pretty easy to understand, is this emphasis on trying to understand life and how it comes together. The motivation, I think, is driven by the fact that every seven and a half seconds, somebody in the country turns 50. Every seven and a half seconds, somebody in this country turns 50. As those upper ends of the baby boomers get to 50, they're stopping and they're saying, there has to be something more to life.
Radical things are taking place. Radical changes are taking place. The workplace, as you are experiencing it today, is vastly different than it was 15 years ago. And it will be vastly different 15 years from now. By and large, you're going to watch corporations, as you understand them, begin to change radically just in the way they work, just in the way of office, just in the way they dress. I came across something the other day that said in 10 years that basically, by the way, I'm on the cutting edge on this, that basically in 10 years, the necktie will be extinct. Yeah, no kidding. They'll say, with the exception of attorneys who have to be in court in those settings, but other than very formal state settings, the necktie is gone. Because people just say, this is useless. Some guy, whoever got a necktie patent is the guy that's making out on this deal, because this makes no sense.
Life in corporate is changing and people are changing the way they look at life. Now they're saying, I want to have some meaning in life. All of a sudden, you get the good news that you have a reason and a purpose for living, that God has something for you, that He's uniquely gifted you, that He's strategically placed you, that He's allowed you to experience a variety of things in your life so that you can be used by Him right where you are now. That's what we talked about last week.
The Greatest Obstacle to Purpose
Now, as you walk out of here and you said, okay, I got a purpose, I got a reason, I got a focus, I got all this stuff, there is one gigantic obstacle that every one of you will face. It will rear its ugly head in a variety of ways, but every person in this room has experienced this and will continue to experience it in a variety of areas. To the extent that it gets the upper hand in the struggle with you, to that extent, your life and your purpose will be diminished. Here it is. And Jesus knew this. Jesus understood exactly how you and I are wired. So more often than any other prohibition, He gave you this prohibition: Do not be afraid.
It's fear that will paralyze you. Now, there's a good fear. Fear of the Lord is good. That reverential honor, that veneration that you have of God where you focus on His majesty and His holiness and His glory. But that's not what we're talking about. We're talking about fear that comes between you and the reason God took hold of you. Life will throw fear at you in all sorts of different areas.
What Are People Afraid Of?
We'll do a little interaction here. This is your chance to prove how insightful you are. It's also a temptation for you to try to be clever and witty. Let me encourage you to leave that to the professionals. So let's play this straight for a change. I used to ask the question this way: What are you afraid of? I've done this with dozens and dozens of groups. All-male group, all-female groups. I've done it in business settings. I did it with the cardinals. They're afraid to win. They're almost ready now to go for a tie. We've done it all over the place. The point here will become evident very quickly. Please, refrain from saying duck, hook, or any of those things.
Since the question, what are you afraid of, is so intimidating, let me phrase it this way: What do you think people that you know are afraid of? What is it?
"Change?"
"Dying?"
"Failure?"
I can't hear. Did you hear the female tone to that voice? Isn't that interesting? This slug I'm dating is afraid of commitment. What else?
"Money, finance?"
"Success?"
"Yeah, the job."
"Failure?"
Yeah, the sister of that.
What else? Just life. Health? All of you get that whole gamut in there. We can probably take that list and expand it, really, almost forever. But as you work your way through this, you're going to see even some of these that may not specifically fit, I think you're going to see how they drop into certain categories.
The Fear of Death
I think the first one that was said was death. There is one guy in particular who is fascinated by death. Every time he talks about it or gets around it, Larry King cannot help but talk about dying. When he's got Billy Graham on there, he'll ask Billy Graham twice. Every time he's there, "You're not afraid of dying at all, are you?"
Here's just a quote, just a short quote from Larry King. He said, "Death, having had a heart attack, trust me, it's a big fear. I saw no lights. I saw no angels. Nothing."
A fascinating interview about three weeks ago with Larry King and Morton Downey Jr. Morton Downey Jr. was just 12 and a half hours from going into surgery to have a tumor removed from his lung. I said to Susan, "I will guarantee you that before the first break, Larry King will say, 'Are you afraid of dying?'" So he said, "We're glad you're here." Larry did the setup. He said, "Let me ask you this. You look calm. Are you afraid of dying?" And he said, "I'm scared to death." Larry asked him that question five or six times.
You and I have a tendency, especially when we get real spiritual, to forget how petrified people are of death. In fact, Larry King said a fascinating thing, and I would really encourage you to listen to these people when they talk. Larry King doesn't even have the guts to be an atheist. He's an agnostic. It's the worst possible position. He's claiming spiritual Switzerland, but he's on his way to hell.
The Desperation People Feel
So he's an agnostic. At the end of this thing, people don't have a clue of what to do. When we're dealing with death, we're stuck. Unless you're a Christian, you're really struggling here.
At the end of the interview, Larry King said to Morton Downey, Jr., "As you go into that operating room, we want you to know that our prayers are with you." Well, who has Larry King prayed to? A ceiling fan? What do you do here? But that's how goofy we get, because when we get to death, man, we got problems. We are afraid. I'm not talking about us as Christians—I'm talking about the rest of the world.
That's why every funeral you go to, I don't care who the guy was, Jeffrey Dahmer, they'll get the guy to heaven. You never hear him say, "We're here today because Bart has died, and I think most of you know Bart's gone his way to hell." They'll never say that. No one ever makes that claim. No one ever makes that point. Because that is a horrific idea. And yet, here's what you need to understand, it's reality. It's reality, I think, for the vast majority of people in the world.
How petrifying is the thought of death? One-third of the people in this country—we're not talking now about India—one-third of the people in the United States of America believe in reincarnation. Or as we say here at the study, "If at first you don't succeed, die, die again." And what they're saying is, "I don't want to face this."
The Reality of Death and Eternity
Well, here's the reality. When you die, this life is over, there are no second chances, and you will not come back as a squirrel or as a king. You will either then go to heaven and be with God forever, or go to hell and be separated forever. That's the reality. And while we laugh at that and have fun with that, that is an awful idea. That if those that you love, if those that you care about, your friends, if they die without knowing Christ, they'll spend eternity in hell.
What we said in the beginning is, Jesus says, "Don't be afraid." And the reason He says, "Do not be afraid," is because He's the antidote to whatever it is you're afraid of. So when it comes to death, Luke is able to write, "God raised Jesus up again," speaking of the resurrection, "and in doing that, He put an end to the agony of death." You and I do not anymore have to be afraid of death, or wonder about death. You can know.
The Certainty of Salvation
I never heard this. I was in church a lot as a young man growing up, and I never once heard that I could sit there that day and know that one day I would be in heaven. Know it. I mean with certainty.
What I heard was, "Jesus did some stuff, but unless you do yours, you'll never be there." In other words, here's what you need to do. "Do this, do this, do this, you'll be a Christian. At least for a while. But don't screw up, because if you screw up, they can take your card back." So here's how it's going to go. "The good things, the bad things, we'll add them all up. When you die, we hit grand total, and if there's more good than bad, you go to heaven. If there's more bad than good, you're going to hell."
I reached a point where I said, "Screw this, because I know I can't be good enough." I know I do more bad than good, so why don't I do a lot of really bad, because I'm going, and I can't—how bad can hell be? Hell's hell, and so I'm going to go, so I might as well have some degree of fun here. I grant you that is really goofy logic, but that's how my mind works. I'll throw the dice and say, maybe yours too.
What It Means to Be a Christian
Well, all of a sudden, I heard one day, if I come to Christ in repentance and faith, what does that mean? That means believe that Jesus is who He said He was, that Jesus will do what He said He would do, and then begin to trust Him to make those promises real in my life. That's what it means to be a Christian.
If I will have that experience, if I will do that in my life, if I will come to Him in repentance and faith, I can know today that I'll have heaven. I'm standing before you today, and I am as certain of my going to heaven as the saints that are already there. That's a big deal.
And when you're sitting there, and it's time to die, and you're petrified, and you're afraid, Jesus says, "Don't be afraid. Come to Me. Believe I'm who I said I was."
I use the term economic insufficiency. We mentioned it in the context of money, but that leaves it kind of vague. I would doubt, if we had a show of hands, that there's anyone in this room who can see themselves someday as homeless. I don't think that's what you're wrestling with here. I watched dozens of guys lose it all in the late 80s, and losing it all meant still retaining a 5,000 square foot house and two Mercedes. I mean, what the heck is "lose it all"? There's not a person in here who's afraid of losing it all to the point of insufficiency in our own definition.
Yesterday morning at 5:48, I got a fax. How do I know? Our fax machine is linked up to the phone that rings in our bedroom. If you want to fax us, why don't you wait till a civil hour, like 7? For me, it doesn't matter because on Wednesday I'm up at 4:30. But my poor wife was troubled by this. Probably the only thing that bothered her more was my comment that said, "Since you're up, how about a little breakfast?"
I was reading exactly this as that fax came in, and I was reminded of the thought that I've had a billion times: wouldn't it be interesting to write down all the things that are my needs, fax them to God, and then have Him fax back an exact list of what I really needed, and see if they were similar at all? Here's what He says: you need food, you need shelter, and you need clothing. But when He's talking about food, He could be talking about Ruth's Chris or He could be talking about a hot dog. When He's talking about shelter, He could be talking about a house on Camelback or He could be talking about a studio efficiency. When He's talking about clothing, He could be talking about $150 golf shirts or He could be talking about $4 Ross Dress for Less shirts.
Seeking First His Kingdom
What He's saying is, when these needs are met, that's enough. Here's what He says: seek first my kingdom and my righteousness, and I'll figure this other stuff out for you. It's not a call to be lazy. It's not a call to be slothful. It's a call to say there's a perspective here that I have to attain, and the perspective is literally this: to lose myself in obedience to Him.
This has something to do with this lesson. Let me deal with this: some of you are incredibly frustrated spiritually, and I think when you get to this area, you get a real good example of why. Because you've said, "Lord, Lord, Jesus, You're my master. You're my Savior. You're the one." You sit in church and sing "You're more precious than silver, You're more precious than gold." If you can get enough guts, you sing "I surrender all," and then you go out and live like every other pagan pig when it comes to money.
All of your thoughts, all of your desires, all of your career decisions, all of the things that you wrestle with, you begin to evaluate as how they will impact your kingdom, not His. The balance sheet that you want to see improved is yours, not His. The assets that you want to see grow and develop are yours, not His. And then you go back to church and sing "I surrender all" and wonder why you're frustrated. Because your destination has been changed. You're Christians I'm talking to, but you make choices like the rest of the world, and you will always be miserable in that capacity.
A Career Decision Story
I had a fascinating conversation with a young man the other day. He called and said, "Listen, I got to make a choice. I know you're going on vacation. I need help. I got an opportunity career-wise to move, to go with a great company, and it is a great company, and to make twice as much money." I said, "So what's the decision?" He said, "Well, it's in another town." I said, "Well, we'll miss you." And he said, "Well, also, all of a sudden, I'm going to have to travel two, three weeks a month." I said, "Okay. You're single. What's the problem here?"
He said, "Well, I got a pretty strong ministry right now with some high school kids. And when I move, there's no way I can replicate that ministry because I'm not going to have the time with the travel and the work to do it." I said, "Okay, see you later." He said, "No, no, no, help me think it through." I said, "Okay, let's do it. On a scale of one to ten, what's the job you have now?" He said, "Oh, man, it's a seven or eight. It's a great job." "On a scale of one to ten, what's ministry right now?" And he said, "I'm going to tell you, it's a seven or eight. It'd even be higher, but I just don't quite have enough time to get more."
I said, "Now you make the job change. You're making twice as much money, but you're traveling more. What's the job really going to be?" He said, "I don't know, seven, eight, maybe." "What's the ministry going to be?" And he said, "Zero." I'd asked him early on, "Don't you have enough money now?" And he said, "Yeah, I really do."
Let me tell you, men and women, I understand the tension in that decision, but it really isn't even a decision. He has no business moving to take that job. He has every right to do it, and I guarantee you all of his secular friends would say, "Are you nuts?" But let me really go out on a limb. If I could climb into his little brain, here's what's going on: the attraction to that job isn't the travel or even the more money, because I don't think he's a money-motivated guy. I think he wants all of his friends to know he's sharp enough and bright enough and competent enough to get that kind of a job.
He's going to say, I don't really want it. I took this stupid job so all my friends would know I was bright enough and sharp enough and competent enough to get it. That's why some of you went to law school. That's why some of you became accountants. That's why some of you are engineers, because you wanted your friends or your parents or somebody to go, wow, these are really smart. He's a nuclear physicist. Hey, what does that mean? He's unemployed. That's what that means, and boring too.
So what are we doing here? When all of His life, what is it you always wanted to do? I keep coming back to this. What is that gut issue? You always wanted to do it, and you always come back to it. That's the dream you pursue.
And if you have to say that you're going to have to do it in a car that's 10 years old instead of six months old, if you're going to have to do it in a 2,000-square-foot house instead of a 4,000-square-foot house, if your suits are going to cost $190 instead of $500, so be it. Nothing at the end of your life is going to matter. Golly, how many times have we heard this lately? But faith, family, and friends. That's all that's going to matter. Haven't we been talking about this for six months?
What Really Matters at the End
I had a conversation with a guy the other day. He's 73. He's dead. He's as good as dead. He'll be dead within a month, month and a half. He's got cancer everywhere. He's dead.
We're talking. As we're talking, I said, when did you become a Christian? 1933 at Madison Baptist Church at 12th Street in Camelback. Wow, that's amazing. That's all He wanted to talk about. And then I said, well, how long have you guys been married? 51 years. Oh, and it's been terrific. We got two kids. Our daughter's living with us. I don't know how we'd get along if she wasn't there to help us. We got some terrific friends.
And then I had to ask Him down the road what He did for a living and a career and all this other stuff. Hey, dissect it. Listen to what the dying man said. Faith, family, friends. It's the same thing I've been saying to you for six months. You're going to get it at the end of your life, I'm telling you. And you're going to say, faith, family, and friends.
So why do you have to go to the end, be miserable and empty at the end, understand it now, and make the appropriate adjustments in your life right now? Jesus said, you don't have to worry about stuff, because I'll take care of that.
The Fear of Rejection
Oh, we've got to go fast now. Here is one. And you are so secure that I don't think anybody mentioned this. And that's rejection. We would get it in the context of peer pressure. It might be another phrase for it.
Years ago, I was invited to speak to a junior high group. And some parents found out I was going to talk to them. And I had three or four parents call and say, will you talk to them about peer pressure? I said, sure. So I got in there, and I said, I've had calls from your parents, and they want me to talk to you about peer pressure. So I think that's what I'll do. Let me tell you how much peer pressure your parents are under.
Now, I don't want to minimize the pressure that these kids are under. In just two or three weeks from now, they're going to come into the classroom, and four or five kids are going. They're not even going to say anything. But they are going to determine the style of shirt that should be worn in that class for the rest of the year. What you eat, what you don't eat. My girls have a great saying now. Dad, that was the 80s. That was the 80s, Dad. We're in the 90s. And I said, well, I understand that. So I'll try to be different. I'll try to be hip and happening.
Well, all of a sudden, those half a dozen kids are going to determine what's right in the sense of style. I'm not even talking now about patterns of behavior or moral or ethics. But there's pressure to conform. And you are goofy if you underestimate the pressure that the kids have. They have a very tough life. I know that you look at it and go, oh, those are the good old days and all this. But I'm telling you, don't minimize this. It's a tough life.
Adults Face the Same Pressure
By the same token, I tell them, don't minimize the pressure your parents are under. Because it's the same pressure, except to have the right backpack. Now it's to have the right car. Instead of having the right shirt, it's now to have the right house.
See, there is a point at which you understand that if you're going to try to please people, you are never going to achieve what you're never going to make them happy. Rejection is certain. The ones that you love the most are going to reject you and hurt you, if just on a temporary basis, and maybe not even realize it as they do it.
But on a deeper level, Jesus said, they persecuted me, they will persecute you. You are fooling yourself if you think that you can call Him Lord and Master, and then think that somehow the slave will receive better treatment in the world than the master did.
God's Complete Acceptance
Now in the midst of all this, here's the comfort, that you have been adopted, that you are part of God's family, that God accepts you. Here's the interesting thing. In the whole world, no one knows me, I don't think, better than Susan. But even as well as Susan knows me, there's a lot of things that I've said that she's never heard. There's a bucket load of thoughts that I've had that she can't possibly, nor would she want to, get in there and try to break these things apart.
But now I come to God. All of a sudden, you know, understand that when you go to God, and now let's say you're going to confess a sin. Do you understand when you do that, He's not in heaven going, Oh, wow, I didn't know that. We better rethink this position. There is nothing that you can do to surprise God. There's nothing that you do that He doesn't know about. There's no thought that you've had, as evil and despicable and hideous as it is, that He doesn't know. And He said, that's fine, Tom. Just come on, because I'm going to accept you exactly the way you are. Those things do
not make me happy, but those things are not going to break the relationship that we have. As the world rejects you, it's important to understand that you've been adopted and that you're part of that family and that there's nothing that can break that.
The Fear of Loneliness
There's a sister fear that goes with it. It's the fear of loneliness, of being all alone, of being totally isolated. We had a guy in one of our studies at La Paloma, and the room was always divided with an aisle down the middle and then two large sections. This guy always sat on the left section, last row on the aisle. I came in one day, room filled, 250 guys, whatever it is. I came in, tapped him on the shoulder and said, "It's really good to see you, I'm glad you're here." That's all I did.
I went to the front, talking to some guys, and it's time to start, so I'm getting my notes together. I look down and I see these pair of feet. As I look up, it's this guy. The tears are pouring down his face. He said to me, "You don't know how badly I needed someone to touch me today. I am so alone."
Now, the tragedy of that is that here is, in theory, a Christian guy, sitting in a room of Christian people, totally isolated. The greatest illustration of my whole life in this particular area, I get a call from a young guy, again in Tucson. This guy's about 33 years old. This guy's a stud—he's got a billion dollars, got money all over, red Porsche, he grinds golf balls four or five times. This guy's got everything, so we're together, and it's clear something isn't clicking in this guy's life. I quickly have learned to understand that most of these guys are unbelievably lonely.
So I said to him, "If you had a problem today, tonight, and you had to call somebody, there was a problem you had, and you had to talk to somebody, who would you talk to?" When I was in sales, by the way, those of you that are in sales, this is a great tip. When you run out of things to say, try keeping your mouth closed. It's very effective, and it throws all of the pressure on the other person.
Well, I know at this point, and I'm pretty good at that point in the sales negotiation, I know I'm done talking, and I'm not going to talk if we've got to sit there the rest of the day, because I've got the question I want on the table. I'm cutting my eggs, I'm moving my eggs, I'm shifting eggs all around the place. Finally, I look up, and again, his eyes are all teared up, and he said—now think if this isn't a pitiful statement—"If I had to really talk to somebody, and I was really in trouble, I would have to talk to my dog."
What's sad is, some of you don't even have a dog. You're all alone, and you're isolated. Well, that needs to be remedied, because you need a human touch. You need that human interaction. But again, Jesus says, even when that's gone, you need to understand there's something. "The Lord is the one who goes ahead of you, and He'll be with you, and He won't fail you, and He won't forsake you, so don't be afraid." You don't have to worry about being alone, because I'm there.
Psalm 139, He said, "I'm above you, I'm below you, I'm around you, you can't go and hide from Me. When you go to the dark, and I come, the light overshadows, you can't get away from Me." Are you afraid of being alone? Jesus is the antidote.
The Fear of Suffering
How about this? We've got three more, we've got to do them pretty quickly. Suffering. I would divide that really into two areas: suffering which is just part of life, and then suffering that's part of a spiritual process. Rather than say, "Suffering be gone," God tells us in His words to understand that suffering is a process of life. Understand that suffering—here's the way Haley would say it—suffering is your friend.
So that James can write these words: "When you encounter all kinds of trials and temptations and they crowd into your life, don't resist them as intruders but welcome them as friends and realize that they come to test your faith and to produce in you endurance." That's what suffering does. If you're going to grow spiritually, the only way that you are going to grow spiritually or the best way that you're going to grow spiritually is through suffering.
In the good times, you typically won't listen. It's just like I've said to you, there is not a person here who doesn't understand faith, family and friends are where this thing is going to end up and that's what's truly important. The tragedy is, like the vast majority of people, you're going to diddle it around until the end of your life and go, "Yep, they were right."
It's the same thing in this area of suffering. In the good times, for whatever reason, we won't get it. We won't listen. But all of a sudden, in a hardship, it's a very interesting phenomena—all of a sudden we listen more. All of a sudden, in difficult times, spiritual things and life, consequently, gets to get focused more. We need to understand that suffering is what God uses frequently to produce in our life a sense of endurance.
Using a parallel between this and the physical, here's the way we'd say it. Suffering is your spiritual aerobics. It's aerobic activity for you spiritually that produces endurance in your life.
Now here's a counterpart of this. It is absolutely dead wrong to think there is necessarily a direct correlation between your circumstance and your spiritual condition. All of a sudden, everything's falling apart, so there must be something wrong spiritually. Not necessarily so. Maybe it is. Maybe it isn't. Conversely, just because everything's going good, that doesn't mean, "Man, I must be a spiritual giant." If that's the case, I'm guessing Bill Gates must be some sort of super spiritual giant and I don't know that that's the condition.
God uses suffering. And in the middle of suffering, He's looking for one thing from you. I have no clue what you're going through, but I do know
What God is looking for from you in the middle of suffering is obedience to the promises He's giving you. That's what He's after. That's why Larry Wright can say, "I'd rather suffer obediently than prosper disobediently because I know my obedient suffering is as temporary as my disobedient prospering." God doesn't give a rip about the result—that's His job. What He cares about from you is the process, which is critical, and He cares about obedience.
You afraid of suffering? You need not be. And here's why: because there's meaning and there's purpose in your suffering. God will use it to cause growth in your life. He will deepen your faith. And here's the spectacular thing that comes out of hardship—He'll then use you to share that experience with others as they go through it.
I mean, it's one thing for me to go in and talk to a young mother who's just lost a baby. But it's a whole different game when another mother who's experienced the same thing walks into the room. It's totally different. We had a couple in our church that went through exactly that. They struggled and they didn't see much. After six months, another couple in the church experienced the same thing. The husband made the comment to me, "For the first time in six months, I'm beginning to understand why God allowed this to happen."
The Fear of Failure
Two more things that people are afraid of. This is a big one that stops most of you cold: failure. We pick up an illustration here of John Mark. Paul and John Mark did not get off to a great start on that first missionary journey. If you remember, Mark said no mas and back home he went.
So when it came time for the second missionary journey, all of a sudden, Barnabas says, "Let's take Mark with us." And Paul says, "We're not taking Mark anywhere. Mark's a loser. Mark is not worthy of going with us. Mark is not going to make this trip." So Barnabas and Paul actually split up, the splitting up issue being John Mark.
At the end of his life, as he lays preparing for death, Paul said this: "Only Luke is with me so pick up Mark, bring him with me for he is useful for service." Very important to understand in life: success is not forever and failure is not fatal.
About the only way that I can guarantee you that you won't fail is to never try, which in my mind has to be the greatest failure you can have. I am a gigantic fan—and I have learned long ago that politics should not be used as illustrations because all of a sudden certain people can't hear you because of the politics of it. So I ask you to hang in with me.
Learning from Failure
I am a big fan of Richard Nixon. My admiration for him stems from his encyclopedic mind, his understanding of humanity and the human condition, and his literally moving beyond humble beginnings. But the thing that I admire most about Richard Nixon—and frankly the vast majority of it happens from the resignation on.
You're not going to get anything more humiliating in your life than to have to resign the presidency of the United States. It doesn't get any worse than that. I don't care what, I don't care how bad you screw up, it can't get worse than this one. The question is, what do you do with it?
You want to do yourself a big favor? Scrub together $16.95 and smoke your little buns over there to a Borders, go to the audio book section and in there you'll find a book called In the Arena. Don't go get the copy of it, get the audio book, the two-tape. It's Nixon talking about life primarily after Watergate. Listen to the mind. Listen to how he understands failure and he, in his own way, as much as he possibly can, admits that he's wrong. And listen to how he builds on it.
See, that's what you have to have. At some point you've got to say, "Well, failure's not my favorite thing in the world, but if I'm going to do something, I'm going to fail."
Not Being Afraid to Miss
I remember interviewing Paul Westphal and talking to him about in the clutch and what it was like in the clutch. We were talking about specifically Havlicek. At the time I was doing interviews the way that I like to do most of it—I was asking the question and answering it all at the same time. I said, "Paul, Havlicek was really good at the end of the game because he was really confident he could make the shot. Is that right?"
And Paul said, "No, that's not right at all." Paul said, "Havlicek wanted the ball at the end of the game not because he thought he could make the shot, but because"—and men and women, this is critical—"he wasn't afraid to miss the shot."
See, I'll tell you what's pitiful. I don't think it's pitiful to get in the hunt and be coming down the 18th fairway and all of a sudden you gag it into the water. Or all of a sudden you make a good shot and somebody makes a better one. I don't think there's anything wrong with that. What to me is pitiful is never teeing it up on the first hole. That's pitiful.
What's pitiful to me is to say, "I know that God's placed me here and given me talent and given me a gift, but I'm scared to death I'm going to screw it up. I'm afraid I'm going to fail. So I'm not going to do anything." That's pitiful.
Can you imagine standing before God and saying, "Yep, I know You gave me the talent. I know You gave me the gift. I know You put me in the game. I know You suited me up. I know You gave me the ball. I know You gave me the tee. I know You gave me the club. I know You paid my green fees. I know You got me out there, but I was afraid maybe I'd hit a bad shot. So I never really swung at it." What an awful way to live.
The Fear of Insignificance
There's one more fear. I think it's the fear of insignificance. It's the fear that I'm just going to pass through this world and when I die nobody's going to know that I was here. I want to make a difference.
Let me net it out for you. It's exactly what Peter says in 1 Peter 5: "Humble yourselves before God. Prostrate yourself before Him. Ask Him to take control of your life and drive it, and then He will exalt..."
you at the proper time. That's where it becomes significant. The only significant institution on the planet is not Microsoft. It's not the Phoenix Suns. It's not Priority Living. The only significant, truly significant institution on the planet is the body of Christ.
The only thing that matters is not building homes and houses and bridges or careers or strong resumes. The only thing that matters are people and God's Word. If you want to be significant, you dump yourself into equipping and encouraging those in the body and at the same time touching and reaching out to people and your life becomes significant immediately.
Fear and Trust: The Choice Before Us
Here's how we net it out. Important for you to understand. Fear is just part of this thing. It is going to be your greatest obstacle. That's why Jesus said so many times, "Do not be afraid." Every time you have an opportunity to fear, you have a corresponding opportunity to trust God. Every time there's an opportunity to fear, God is saying, "That's fine, I understand that, but you can trust Me in this." When I opt for fear, that's a sin. My choice is to trust Him.
I know it sounds like a bumper sticker, but I believe it's absolutely true, and I think it's the perspective you need as you approach life. We truly do not know what the future holds, but we do know who holds the future. I know this: He isn't going to put anything in my life that He hasn't first okayed or caused, and whatever it is that comes in, He's going to give me the strength, not just to endure it, but to thrive in the midst of it.
I don't know what you're afraid of, but I can tell you this: Jesus is the antidote.
Father, we pray that You would make us men and women who indeed understand that You have called us for a reason and a purpose, and You have given us a mission uniquely designed for us, and You've prepared us uniquely through our experiences, through our life. You strategically placed us in just this office, or just this marriage, or just this church, wherever it is. Father, we pray that You would give us the wisdom to see how You have so beautifully brought together our life, that You would give us the wisdom to see how You would have us live and what You'd have us do.
And then, Father, we pray You would give us the courage in the midst of fear, in the midst of what humanly may look like overwhelming odds, that You would give us the courage to be obedient to You and follow You. Father, we ask it of You, in Jesus' name, Amen.
See you in September!