1 Peter 5 - Humble Leaders
Tom Shrader expounds 1 Peter 5:1-5, addressing both church elders and congregation members about godly leadership and followership. He emphasizes that elders must shepherd God's flock voluntarily, not for money or power, but as humble examples who will receive an eternal crown from Christ. The teaching concludes with a call for all believers to clothe themselves with humility, as God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.
“Humility is not thinking less of yourself, but it's simply thinking of yourself less.”
— Tom Shrader
Series: 1 Peter
Recorded: 2012
Duration: 50 min
Themes: humility, leadership, pride, shepherding, service, authority, grace, example, elder, pastor, church leader, struggling with pride, new to leadership, mentor, seeking guidance, young adult
Scripture: 1 Peter 5:1-5, Psalm 23, Matthew 20:25, Acts 20:33, 2 Peter 2:3, 2 Timothy 4:7-8, 2 Corinthians 4:16-18, Isaiah 14:13-14, Isaiah 66:2, 1 Corinthians 13:4-7, Acts 2
Theological Themes: ecclesiology, church structure, pastoral care, eldership, spiritual maturity, servant leadership, biblical authority, sanctification
Full Transcript
Open your Bibles to 1 Peter chapter 5, and we're going to look today at verses 1, 2, 3, 4 and 5 out of 1 Peter chapter 5. We'll finish our study in 1 Peter next week. What I'd like to do today is to read the passage. I'm going to read it from the New American Standard, then read it from Eugene Peterson's paraphrase, The Message, as well.
Also, we had a conversation this week and I came in kind of in the middle of it, but we were just talking about different things that go on within the service. We were talking about distractions within the service. I shared last week that the previous two weeks I came to church and just sat out where you sit and made a lot of observations. Not intentionally, just as things were happening around me, and one of them was just how easy it is to distract the people around you.
I was in the afternoon service and had a young man I would guess he was around 10 or 11 who got up four times during the message. I presume he went to the bathroom—I have no idea what he was doing. Either way, I wanted to whack him in the head and wondered where his mom or dad was. Up, down, up, down—that's eight times this kid walked in front of me. I had adults behind me who talked almost the entire time. I had a lady with a baby, and it was a wonderful baby who was about three rows in front of us, but when she held it up, she distracted all five rows behind her.
Being Sensitive to Others During Worship
What I would really encourage you is to be sensitive to the people around you. I understand that people have to get up during service, but there's really no excuse to be talking back and forth. Be sensitive, especially with children. Tyler and Haley bring Braden and Yale—Braden's seven, Yale's five—to the service on Sunday night, and they do well. They sit, they have their Bibles, they take notes, they can handle it.
If you have kids and students, that's your call to make. Oftentimes there are people who are with us maybe for the first time and not even aware that there's children's ministry or ministry for infants. But from birth through sixth grade, we have ministry available for you and for you to use. So please be sensitive, and I will just tell you as a dad: you're going to get a lot more out of a message if you place your child in children's ministry than if you bring them in and you're worried about that.
So just be sensitive to that. Be sensitive to the people around you. It's really interesting for me to now come on Sunday and be out there and come to a staff meeting—I come with a little bit of a different sense of what's going on. I say that not by way of chastisement, but by way of information to you and kind of a heads up. Feel free—I know it's not the easiest thing to do, we try to do it, but it's awkward for ushers as well—but feel free to the people around you to share that you'd love to help them find their way to children's ministries or whatever it might take.
The Text: 1 Peter 5:1-5
1 Peter chapter 5, verses 1, 2, 3, 4, 5: "Therefore, I exhort the elders among you, as your fellow elder"—so Peter says I'm writing to the elders, plural, and I'm writing as a fellow elder. He's not putting himself above them. He's not pulling rank here, saying I'm just one of you guys—"and I'm a witness of the sufferings of Christ, and a partaker also of the glory that is to be revealed. Now to these elders he writes: Shepherd the flock of God among you, exercising oversight not under compulsion, but voluntarily according to the will of God, and not for sordid gain, but with eagerness, nor yet as lording it over those allotted to your charge, but proving to be examples to the flock. And when the Chief Shepherd appears, you will receive the unfading crown of glory."
"You younger men, likewise, be subject to your elders, and all of you clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, for God is opposed to the proud, but gives grace to the humble."
Now, let me read you one of the paraphrases and see if this doesn't kind of bring it to life a little bit too: "I have a special concern for you church leaders. I know what it's like to be a leader, in on Christ's suffering as well as the coming glory. Here's my concern: that you care for God's flock with all the diligence of a shepherd. Not because you have to, but because you want to please God. Not calculating what you're going to get out of it, but actually acting spontaneously. Not bossily telling others what to do, but tenderly showing them the way. When God, who's the best shepherd of all, comes out in the open with His rule, He'll see that you've done it right and commend you lavishly. And you who are younger must always follow your leaders. But all of you, leaders and followers alike, are to be down-to-earth with each other, for God has had it with the proud, but delights in just plain people."
The Structure of Peter's Teaching
As you read it through, it's very obvious that at least in verses 1 through 4, Peter's directing his comments toward the elders or the leaders in the church. And then in verse 5, though, he separates this group called "younger men." Most of the scholars would agree that he's singling out a group as part of a whole group. So he's saying to the congregation now, "Here's your responsibility."
I said after the first service, it's like he's saying in verses 1 through 4, "You lead this way," and everybody's saying, "Amen! I could follow that guy!" And then in verse 5 he's saying, "You follow that way," and all the leaders are saying, "Be a pleasure to lead a guy like that!" He's painting a picture here of the relationship between the elders and the congregation within the church. But what I want to do at the end of this is take a little bit of time and move this even beyond this elder-congregation relationship, because there's a key component in this that is at the core, I think, of every human relationship.
So he says first of all, "I exhort..."
Transcript says "you it means to call alongside In a general sense to encourage or compel somebody in a certain direction." This appears to be corrupted. Let me work with what's clear:
The Plurality of Elders
Peter exhorts elders, and there are terms that are used interchangeably in Scripture: elder, bishop, overseer, pastor. I encourage those who are elders, and that eldership is marked by spiritual maturity as well as, I think He has in mind here, the office of elder as well.
Peter and all of the New Testament speak of elders in terms of plural, always in terms of plural as it relates to the position, as it relates to speaking of the group of leaders. They may talk of themselves individually - Peter may say "I, a fellow elder" singularly - but they talk about the term we would use as plurality of elders.
Let me give you at least three reasons for this. It's very important.
Protection Against Error
Number one: the plurality of elders helps protect the church against error. The reality is in Redemption Church Gilbert and most of the Redemption churches in Phoenix, and probably most churches even with boards of elders, there's one elder - in this case particularly me - that you're going to see most of the time. But that elder is not the one. It's not Tom's Church. It's not Jamie's Church or Rick's Church or Luke's Church or Frank's Church.
The church is led by a group of elders, and one of the benefits to that is just doctrinal checks and balances. One thing we do at Redemption Church is every week on Wednesday, the guys that will be teaching not that week but in ten days get together and work their way through the text and allow you to present different arguments, different positions. Oftentimes in those meetings I'll sit and begin to take notes and go, "This is way different than anything I would have seen. This is a different emphasis. I would have gone a different way and perhaps even been wrong in the way I taught that." So that's one of the huge benefits.
Balance and Giftedness
Here's the second thing: the plurality of elders preserves and protects us against an imbalance. When you put people together, they'll have similarities. We talk a lot about fit, about pastors and elders here. We need to fit. We want guys that are philosophically alike, but we certainly don't want eight guys just like me sitting in that room.
When you bring together a diverse group of people and you put them in that room as leaders, you get a sense of balance of the way God gifts. One of the big misconceptions and mistakes is when a church looks at their lead pastor or teaching pastor and expects that guy to be the leader and the administrator and the staffer and the organizer - that somehow this one person has all these gifts. That's not true. To get that person, you need that balance. You need that plurality of elders and gifts being used.
Continuity and Transition
The third thing is it avoids the discontinuity of the church. If what you have is one guy, once that guy's gone, the church is in really serious trouble. In most instances, but not all, that guy does a terrible job of preparing his next guy. Oftentimes after a period of 20 or 25 years even, the church will almost begin to rise up and say, "We've had enough of this one guy."
But a plurality of elders provides, not necessarily a seamless transition, but a good transition. This is my last Sunday teaching on a regular basis. We've had a major transition over the last two or three years, and one of the reasons it's had as little impact, I think, as it's had negatively is because of the balance of elders. It's not a guy leaving. It's a natural part of re-emphasizing of the team.
So Peter makes it - and it's just a passing note here, but it speaks, I think, to those of us that are pretty sensitive to this - that there's this plurality of elders. He said, "I'm one of you guys. No better, no worse, just one of you guys."
Witness of Christ's Suffering
The second part of verse one: "witness of the suffering of Christ." I'm a witness. I saw. There were all sorts of things that Peter could have mentioned at this point, but He doesn't mention, "I was a witness on the Mount of Transfiguration," or "I was a witness of the life of Christ or the miracles of Christ, teaching of Christ, even the resurrection of Christ." I was a witness of the suffering of Christ's redemptive work. He points to a major part - the major part - of Christ's work.
As you go back and look at Peter's first sermon in Acts chapter 2, there it is over and over again: the suffering, the death of Christ. Now tucked in here also with Christ's redemptive work is Christ's restoring work, especially in Peter's life.
Wayne Grudem writes this: "Why does Peter recall this? Probably to demonstrate that restoration, even from grievous sin, is possible with Christ. And thus, to encourage the elders in a humble willingness to be penitent for their sin, rather than be filled with hypocritical pride, an unwillingness to even admit a wrongdoing."
Peter's Personal Reflection
I don't know - total speculation - but when Peter began to reflect back on the suffering of Christ, what we think about is the arrest and the trial and the beating and the scourging and the crucifixion. I would guess it would be impossible for Peter to reflect upon the suffering in Christ and not reflect upon His own failure at the same time. I would think it would be very difficult for Him to think about the suffering of Christ and not think of Himself saying, "I never knew Him, I never knew Him, I never knew Him." But with that failure comes that redemption. Peter said, "I'm totally aware of that. I'm a witness of that."
"I'm a partaker of the glory that's to be revealed." That's a theme that we've seen through this book. We'll see it yet one more time when we get to verse four, so we'll come back to it.
The Shepherd's Call
He said, "I want you to shepherd the flock of God." It could be stated, "I want you to shepherd the sheep of God." When we talk about flock, R.C.H. Lenski writes this: "Flock brings to mind all the shepherd imagery found in the scriptures. The sheep are gentle, defenseless..."
liable to stray, needing a shepherd, happy and peaceful under care, pitiful when lost and scattered. This is God's flock that was bought at a great price. It is exceedingly precious in His sight. A great trust is placed in the hands of the human shepherds who are to pattern their life after God Himself.
Understanding the Sheep and Shepherd Imagery
Some time ago, we taught the 23rd Psalm. I remember my first exposure to the 23rd Psalm in terms of studying it was in Larry Wright's Bible study. He came in one day all frustrated. He'd been to a funeral, and they had taught the 23rd Psalm or read it. That set him off like a rocket because the 23rd Psalm is not about dying—it's about living. It's about a shepherd and sheep.
I don't claim to have any sense of agriculture other than I like corn, watermelon, and canola. But we relied heavily when we taught the 23rd Psalm on Philip Keller's book, *A Shepherd Looks at the 23rd Psalm*. Let me share some comments just to get the idea of sheep, because God could have picked any animal. But the imagery is sheep and shepherd.
For example, God has created most animals with an uncanny instinct to find their way home. If a sheep strays in unfamiliar territory, they become completely disoriented and cannot find their way back home. They spend most of their time eating and drinking, but if they're lost, they're almost helpless to find adequate food. They're indiscriminate in what they eat. They eat healthy food and poison. They'll overgraze. They're not discriminating at all about the water that they drink.
Their wool secretes a large volume of oily lanolin, so their wool is just like sticky paper to all of the things around it. They're incapable of cleaning themselves or cleaning one another. When they're lost, they're lost. They're helpless, hopeless, and defenseless. They'll stampede and run over one another.
The Shepherd's Role
Along comes the shepherd. The job of the shepherd is to protect, to feed, and to calm. At night, they would bring the herds in and they would have different pens. During the day, they would even allow the herds to intermingle. Each shepherd would stand by his pen—a rock area, maybe about two or three feet tall with an opening. The shepherd would stay there and call his sheep. The sheep would know the shepherd's voice and they would come to that shepherd.
Into that pen they would go. Then the shepherd would lay and sleep in front of that opening, so no predator could get in and no sheep could wander out. That's the kind of imagery that He's painting. These guys, as they heard this, would understand that completely. They would understand their role as shepherds. As the people read it, they would understand this is what He's saying—this is who we are.
Spiritually, we tend to wander. Like sheep, we've all wandered astray. We need help and we need protection. He says that's the job in the church. That's the job of the elders, the bishops, the overseers, the pastors, the leaders. "Shepherd the flock of God among you," and do it this way: exercise oversight.
Leading by Example
I want you to provide oversight, to look upon. You're going to do it by way—as He says at the end of verse three—of example. But in between, He gives us a little contrast. I don't want you to serve under compulsion. A shepherd shouldn't be pressured into accepting this role. You do it voluntarily. You're awake, you're diligent, you're not lazy. You're motivated by love, not forced by some sort of obligation. You're passionate about it. You're not apathetic or indifferent.
Secondly, not only are you not serving under compulsion but voluntarily, it's according to the will of God. God's put you there. It's not for sordid gain. What He's saying is there may always be, as money's involved, some sort of a temptation that money becomes the motivator. He said don't let that be the case.
The Question of Compensation
Now here's what He's not saying. He's not saying that those who are leaders should not be paid. We know that from reading passages from Paul's epistles. But He's saying that's not the driving force. In Acts chapter 20, verse 33, Paul, as he's saying goodbye to these elders and farewell to the church at Ephesus, speaks autobiographically reflecting over his time there: "I have coveted no one's silver or gold or clothes. You yourself know that these hands ministered to my own needs and to the men who were with me. In everything, I showed you that by hard work in this manner, you must help the weak and remember the words of the Lord Jesus Himself: 'It is better to give than receive.'"
So He's not saying people in a full-time position or elders shouldn't be compensated. He's saying the motive here is not sordid gain. This has not become the driving force. In 2 Peter, the next book over, Peter's talking about false teachers. In 2 Peter 2:3, he said, "In their greed they will exploit you with false words."
We talk about this—Tyler and I have spent a lot of time talking about this in the last couple of weeks, as there's been lots of conversations about what kind of money pastors are making at different places. Here's what we've always done here, and I will tell you this: we've always paid, and I'm not proud of this, but we've always paid at the low end of what market is for churches our size. We've made some changes to try to improve that situation, but that's probably a reflection of me. When the church started, I didn't take a
I've never taken a salary and haven't to this day. I've been provided the last few years a stipend, a housing allowance, but part of it is I didn't want these things confused, and I didn't want anybody to think somehow it was money that was driving that. But you have pastors around the country who are making an extraordinary amount of money flying around on private jets. I'm not saying there's anything wrong with that, I'm just saying that becomes very dangerous.
I see it all the time when the market gets bad. When a market gets bad like this, it's amazing how many people God seems to be calling into ministry. God rarely calls people in a boom, it seems like. He's saying, be careful here. Watch out for this. And let me be clear now, are guys willing, should they be paid, and can they—absolutely. But he said, that isn't the motive here. That's a byproduct, they have to eat, they have to live.
Don't Lord It Over Them
Here's the third thing I want you to do, verse three, is you're not lording it over people. You're not ruling in a domineering, dominant way. The idea here is forcing somebody to do something under military pressure, political pressure, economic pressure. It's autocratic, it's oppressive, it's intimidating.
In Matthew chapter 20, verse 25, Jesus calls the disciples to Himself, and He says, "You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their great men exercise authority over them. It is not this way among you. Whoever wishes to become great among you should be a servant." When you hear about the term servant leadership, that should be characterized by the picture of Christ.
I'm in a study group, and we're reading a little book called Leading Like Jesus. When I saw the title, I thought, I've got to like this. But it's essentially that thought process. I've got to tell you, this has all sorts of challenges to it. It's not just in the church, it's at the marketplace, it's coaching like Christ, leading like Christ, leading from a position of strength, but leading in a quiet way. Not browbeating, not intimidating, not pulling out your card that says I'm an elder. I will just tell you practically, if you're playing that card very often, you're in real trouble. At that point, you've lost all authority about what that card gives you.
Prove to Be an Example
Don't lord it over them, but prove to be an example. I remember, you know how you're reading through scripture, reading a passage, or you see something, even now, it may not be the first time, but it's the time the lights went on. I remember just reading through Paul's letters, and Paul kept saying, follow me, follow me, follow me, and I thought, wow, that's a big thing to say.
Now, the sentence is follow me as I follow Christ. What Peter is saying to the elders, the pastors, the bishops, the overseers, He's saying you should be able to say to the people, follow me, look at me. Not that I'm perfect, but look at my life.
The Unfading Crown of Glory
And when the chief shepherd appears, you will receive the unfading crown of glory. As Paul closes out His last letter that we have, kind of retained to this day, 2 Timothy, He says, "I fought the good fight, I finished the race, I kept the faith. In the future, there is laid up for me a crown of righteousness." It's that same image, it's that one of the crown.
In that culture, the man who won the race didn't get a gold medal, but got a crown. The military leaders and heroes didn't get medals, but got a crown. In Corinth, if you won one of the Corinthian games, you got a crown, and with it came three things.
Here's the first one, mean even more after the first of the year. You didn't pay any taxes. You were tax exempt for the rest of your life. Number two, you were a hero. That's got to be kind of cool. I love, Football Saturday, in terms of games and volume, obviously yesterday's the worst of them, but that's the game I love, a game I love to watch every year is Army, Navy. I love to watch all the pageantry. As somebody said yesterday, it's pretty cool, He said, this is the only game where the guys playing will be willing to die for the people watching. That's pretty cool.
But after that comes the Heisman. I think it would be so cool to be a Heisman Trophy winner. I have four years of eligibility left, but I don't think I'm going to win the Heisman. You're a Heisman Trophy winner for life. So Sandy, we're bringing her along in college football, and she's liking Desmond Howard. You know, Desmond on Saturday morning, and Desmond gets better every day, He's getting pretty good. I said, He won a Heisman Trophy, wow, Heisman Trophy.
Well, you have your crown that says everywhere you go, hero. So no taxes, hero, here's the third thing, and your kids couldn't be drafted into the service to have to fight. That's a big deal.
Crowns That Fade Away
Paul makes the point, and Peter has it here, is you'll receive an unfading crown. Those are all crowns that fade away. That's our challenge. We're constantly looking at those things around us that seem so real and permanent, but they're all fading away.
The last few weeks, the lesson on Sunday and Wednesday have kind of dovetailed, and this week, the last part of an 11-part series on how to stay straight in a crooked world was to renew ourselves day by day. So we went to 2 Corinthians chapter four, verse 16, 17, 18. "Though the outer man is decaying, the inner man is being renewed day by day. For momentary light, affliction is producing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison. Here's the key, because I look not at the things that are seen, but the things that are unseen, because the things that are seen are temporal, the things that are unseen are eternal."
It's the same idea here. You can run in this race, and you get a crown, and that's a real—a Heisman Trophy's a real cool deal—but it's going to fade away. The outer man is decaying.
In our bathroom, when you come in, to the left is a shower. I love our shower, though it should be a little bit bigger maybe, but it has glass blocks in it. Then there's a bathtub, a big bathtub. I don't think that in the whole time we've lived there, anybody's ever taken a bath in it. And then there's a vanity with a couple of sinks, and then a closet with sliding doors, and the sliding doors are mirrors. So when you get out of the shower, you look, and it's unavoidable.
Last Wednesday, knowing I was going to teach this, I just got out and started laughing as I looked in the mirror, trying to cover myself up from myself, which is stupid. Though the outer man is decaying, the inner man's being renewed day by day. That's the reality that I need to keep coming back to again and again.
The Promise of Eternal Reward
There is within this passage really the idea of a reward. He says in verse four, "When the chief shepherd appears, you'll receive the unfading crown of glory." There's this moment, this eternal reward that's available, not just to shepherds, but to all of us. The scripture again and again calls us and helps us understand that there's an eternal reward. There's that moment when I will receive not just "Well done, good and faithful servant," but whatever is attached to that.
He said that's a legitimate motivation to you and to me. He said, "I want you to shepherd in this way. Prove yourself by your examples. And the ultimate motivation in this is that Christ will one day reward you."
Turning to the Congregation
Verse five: "Now young men likewise." We've seen that word "likewise" before. It's a device that Peter uses to change focus. There's some continuity to what he's been talking about. He's been talking about elders, and he's now going to talk about the congregation. There's continuity, but now he's changing focus.
We've been talking about elders, and if you're here thinking, "Boy, if that's the kind of elders I have, I can't wait to show this to them," he's saying, "Likewise, now, let's turn this mirror the other way." And he says, "Young men."
Is he saying young men chronologically should subject themselves to elders chronologically? Most scholars agree, no. What he's doing here is continuing the same imagery. He's speaking of elders within the church, and he's singling young men out, not because they're a fixed group within the church, but most scholars believe he's singling out young men because they generally are the most aggressive, headstrong, arrogant group to deal with. He's saying everyone, but especially young men.
The Challenge of Working with Young Men
I am speaking right after the first of the year at a pastor's luncheon, and going back and forth on assignments that are wide open, but I think what I'm going to talk about is transition, passing the baton, raising up young men. One of the points that I make, and there are a whole bunch of them, but one of them is that you have to be earnest about it, or they're going to smell it real quickly. They're going to smell you just going through the motions.
But if you're going to deal with young men, you better realize that you're going to have to put up with a lot of stupid, arrogant stuff. That's part of what young is. You think you know everything, and you know not much. Or you may know a lot from a book, but you don't know anything else.
I remember, it just popped into my mind, J.C. Watts was a quarterback at Oklahoma, and then a congressman. His father was retiring, and I can't remember if he worked on a railroad or what. And he was 70, I think. And J.C. said, "What are you going to do?" And he said, "I think I'm going to go to college." And he said, "Go to college, what for?" He said, "I want to go in there and see what they do to you that screws you kids up so much in four years."
Well, one of the things you do is puff a head full of knowledge, but no common sense. So he said, "You guys, and it's going to be really difficult for you, because you're going to want to fight and argue." I know, I speak firsthand. I could be exhibit A in this conversation. And he said, "I want you to settle down, and I want you to listen."
The Call to Humility for All
Let me tie this together. "Young men, likewise, be subject to your elders." So, elders, I want you to lead. Here's how I want you to lead: with the right reason, in a gentle way, a kind way, an understanding way. Those of you in the congregation, especially young guys, but all of you, I want you to submit, to line up under.
But all of you—elders, congregation, every person—all of you, clothe yourself with humility. The word "clothe" there is to tie something onto yourself, like an apron. Wrap yourself in humility. And here's why: "God is opposed to the proud, and gives grace to the humble."
God's not neutral in this process. It's not God saying, "Oh, I understand, this pride's kind of an issue." He said, "No, no, God's opposed to this."
Humility as the Key Ingredient
I'm convinced that the key ingredient to the Christian life, that sets up everything else, is this idea of humility. And in a sense, love springs from that. This whole idea of any relationship—elder and congregation, husband and wife, two friends, people in society—I mean, the culture, the country's falling apart. The country's torn apart. And it's not economics or politics. We've lost all sense of civility, all sense of the capacity to live with one another. And at the core of this becomes humility.
C.J. Mahaney wrote a book with that title, "Humility." And in the foreword, he writes this: "Humility's a funny thing. On one hand, it's an extremely desirable trait. Most of us, as Christians, would say, we want to be humble, right? Or at least, we'd say, we want to be thought..."
The Challenge of True Humility
Few things are as universally prized as humility. Most of us would like to be thought of as humble. At the same time, few of us have given attention to what being humble actually means. Even fewer have considered what it takes to grow in humility.
In place of true humility, we learn certain words or phrases that we believe make us sound humble. "Oh, really? It was nothing. Anyone could have done it." We cast our eyes down, shrug our shoulders, maybe even blush. Of course, we don't really mean it. Inside, we're congratulating ourselves for how humble we look and feel. We want that reputation, but we don't know how to get it in reality.
Webster defines humility as a state of being humble. That's not helpful. Humble is not proud or haughty or arrogant or assertive. It's reflecting, expressing, or offering something in a spirit of deference or submission. Humility's one of those really difficult things because even as I strive for it, if I begin to measure it, I almost inadvertently become proud of how humble I am.
The Deception of the Heart
So I can be driving around town in this magnificent car. I bought the car for one reason, not because it gets me from point A to point B, but so you'll look at it, and you'll have some reaction. You'll look at that car and say that car's a reflection of that person, and you're very proud of the car you drive.
But there are a bunch of people driving around old junkers who are equally proud of how humble they are by driving around in that old junker. The heart is a deceptively wicked thing. So A.W. Tozer says, whether it's self-aggrandizement or self-deprecation, either one is bad because we're still talking about self.
That's the definition of humility that I've used for the last few years. Humility is not thinking less of yourself, but it's simply thinking of yourself less. Sometimes it's helpful even to look at the negative.
Pride: The Greatest Enemy
The enemy of humility is pride. John Stott writes exactly that. "At every stage of our Christian development and in every sphere of our Christian discipleship, pride is the greatest enemy, humility our greatest friend." Pride not only appears to be the earliest of sins, it's the core of all sin. Pride, Stott writes, is more than just the first of the seven deadly sins, it's the essence of all sin.
In Isaiah chapter 14, we're told about how Lucifer became the devil. Here's what we're told. He began to say in his heart, "I will ascend to heaven. I will raise my throne above the stars of God. I will sit on the Mount of the Assembly. I will ascend above the heights of the clouds. I will make myself like the Most High." "I will." And pride begins to drive it all.
God is decisively resistant to the proud and drawn to the humble. Isaiah 66 verse 2, these words from the Lord: "This is the one to whom I will look: he who is humble and contrite in spirit and trembles at my word."
Gospel Humility
There's the little book that was in your book packet. By the way, 20% off everything in the bookstore today. In it, Keller, Tim Keller, writes about the thinking of the Apostle Paul. "His ego is not puffed up, it's filled up." He's talking about humility, although I hate using the word humility because this is nothing like our idea of humility. Paul is saying that he's reached a place where his ego draws no more attention to itself than any other part of his body. He's reached a place where he's not thinking about himself anymore. When he does something wrong or good, he does not connect it with himself anymore.
C.S. Lewis in Mere Christianity makes a brilliant observation about gospel humility, real humility. At the end of his chapter on pride, he says this: if we were to meet a truly humble person, Lewis says, we would never come away from that meeting thinking they were humble. They would not always be telling us that they were nobody because a person who keeps saying they're nobody is actually self-obsessed. The thing we would remember from meeting a truly gospel humbled person is how much they seem to be totally interested in us.
The Freedom of Self-Forgetfulness
Because the essence of gospel humility is not thinking more of myself or thinking less of myself, but thinking of myself less. True gospel humility means I stop connecting every experience, every conversation with myself. In fact, I stop thinking about myself. The freedom of self-forgetfulness, the blessed rest that only self-forgetfulness brings.
It's ingrained in us. I've told you this story a thousand times, how I would come home from a trip and I'd give something to Sarah and Haley would say, "What about me?" Or I'd give it to Haley and Sarah would say, "What about me?" And we spend our whole life naturally flinching in our ego, "What about me?" And humility comes along and says, "Listen, it's not all about you."
Let me read a little more from Keller. "A truly gospel-humble person is not self-hating or self-loving, but a gospel-humble person, the truly gospel-humble person is a self-forgetful person whose ego is just like his or her toes. It just works, it doesn't draw attention to itself. It's toes just work, it's ego just works. Neither draw attention to themselves."
The Transformation Humility Brings
And put a bow on it. Still from Keller. "Because God loves me and accepts me, I do not have to do things to build my resume. I don't have to do things to make me look good. I can do things for the joy of doing them. I can help people to help people, not so I can feel better about myself and not so I can be filled with emptiness."
All of a sudden, I'm not worried about me. That's not the driving force, "What about me?" But it's "What about you?" And now you take that and you put it in every relationship and every relationship works. Sandy and I have been married six and a half, almost seven months. And so on one side, I look and that's a long time. If you have a sore tooth, seven months to have a sore tooth is a long
Seven months, not very long. But in a marriage, for me, it feels like a long time and I'm constantly trying to evaluate and reevaluate, asking how am I doing in this? God taught me a lot in 32 years and I have a chance to, in a sense, start over again and there's a refreshment in that. But how am I doing and what am I doing and when does it seem to work best and when does it not work?
I can tell you, this is so easy. It works best when I'm in my best relationship with Christ and when I'm concerned about what Sandy needs, not about what Tom needs and what will allow me to help her be the best person God could ever be. And then conversely, if she were to somehow be in the other room with the same idea, substitute my name for hers, how can this thing not be great?
And any friendship and any business—we're getting ready and you should be praying, we talk about elders—we're getting ready tomorrow, Monday and Tuesday, we're on a retreat all day with the leadership team of Redemption. So there'll be seven or eight of us locked away and reexamining now Redemption and what we're doing. I can tell you what we're going to have tension in that discussion. That just will be because we have six campuses represented and what about this and what about that? But the key to Redemption to work, like any other relationship, is for us to go, but this isn't about me, it's not about Gilbert or it's not about West Mesa or Arcadia, it's about Redemption and what we think God's called us to do.
The Love Chapter Applied
Let me take you to one passage of scripture, then we're done. First Corinthians chapter 13. First Corinthians chapter 13 and you veterans know that that's the love chapter and I want to do something that I've done probably six times in the last year, so maybe it's fitting to do this on my last Sunday with you is to go to this idea and the concept of love as Paul defines it.
First Corinthians 13, beginning in verse four: love is patient, it's kind, it's not jealous, it doesn't brag, it's not arrogant, doesn't act unbecomingly. In my Bible, this next phrase is circled, probably the key to it all: it does not seek its own. That's what love is. It's not provoked, it doesn't take into account the wrong suffered, it's not keeping score, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoice in truth.
Verse seven, I just want to read you. As I say, I've probably done this six times in the last year. And I'm sure I'm not getting this connected and clear as it's coming out as it is in my mind. It's God connecting this idea of humility and love and the essence of every relationship. What's going to make the church work, the family work, the business work, the culture work, the society work, the gym work, the homeowners association work?
Love Bears All Things
Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. How should you be in your relationship with one another? You should bear all things. Bear all things basically means to cover, to support, to protect. Love bears all things by protecting others from exposure or ridicule or harm. Genuine love does not gossip or listen to gossip. Even when sin is certain, love tries to correct it with the least possible hurt and harm to the guilty person. Love never protects sin, but is anxious to protect the sinner.
Imagine a relationship where instead of trying to expose somebody and their weakness, begin to talk to your friends, well, you know so and so. And that's just the most natural thing in the world. You find it, here you go, here's a friend, and you know something about Him. You know it's not, it's generally known, but maybe not known by everyone. And somebody you meet has just met this person for the first time, and they can't wait to tell you how great this guy is. He's the most terrific guy, he's awesome. Here's what he said, this'll make it even worse. And what he said was something brilliant, but all he's doing is repeating you.
How come your natural flinch is to say, let me tell you something else about Him? Well, because you don't love Him. And because you're not acting in a spirit of humility. Love bears all things.
Love Believes All Things
Love believes all things. Love is not suspicious or cynical. It throws a mantle over a wrong. It also believes the best outcome for the one who's done the wrong. Believes that that wrong will be confessed and forgiven, and the Lord will restore.
It bears all things, it believes all things, it hopes all things. Even when belief in a loved one's goodness or repentance is shattered, love still hopes. When it runs out of faith, it holds onto hope. As long as God's grace is operative, human failure's never final.
God would not take Israel's failure as final. Jesus would not take Peter's failure as final. Paul would not take the Corinthians' failure as final. There are more than enough promises in the Bible to make love hopeful.
Love Endures All Things
It bears all things, believes all things, it hopes for all things, it endures all things. It's a military term that speaks of holding an army's vital position at all costs. Every hardship, every suffering that's endured in this process. Love holds fast to those it loves.
It endures all things at all costs. It stands against overwhelming opposition and refuses to stop bearing or stop believing or stop hoping. Love will not stop loving. That's what He calls us to do.
Application to All Relationships
Again, in the context of our lesson, it's elders and congregation, but it's ultimately all of us in every relationship. So if you're in relationships now, and this part is shattered here and this part is shattered here and this part is shattered here, my suspicion would be in the midst of this somehow you're overly either exercising your rights or concerned about the violation of them. That'd be my guess.
And then you begin to see as you're honestly, just see how this infiltrates every aspect of our life. Kids are getting ready to go to college. Some of you are getting ready to take hundreds of thousands...
of dollars worth of debt to go to a certain school, not even for the education, just so to look good on a resume or at the Christmas party, you can say Biff went to Brown? And it sounds good. Why do you drive what you drive? Wear what you wear, live where you live? Why is it important to redo this? How much of it is concerned about your image, which is pride, which is the utmost evil and a complete anti-God state of mind?
Well, the only way you're going to get there, and there's only one way, is to understand my sin and the need of a savior and what Christ did on the cross.
If you're over in the conference center, the guys are going to come and close that service here. Neil's on his way up to lead us in a time of communion. Let's pray as he does.
Father, let us have a mind in us that was also in Christ Jesus. And that mind was one of humility, became obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. God, allow us to think this way, see people this way. Watch our relationships blossom as You are in the middle of that. God, guard our heart and our minds, draw us close to You. We pray in Christ's name, amen.